Camels of Mass Destruction

If the government in your town were so corrupt that everyone discontinued calling the police for help, then the new sheriff in town comes in to fix things... is there suddenly more violence and crime in the town because you're finally hearing about it?

If you answered "yes, there is more violence and we were safer under the previous sheriff," then here's your sign.

Here's hoping the "Iraq was safer with Saddam crowd" never finds themselves to be the victim of their own "logic."

Because things were just "better under Saddam...."

______________

By James Langton (with UnCommon Sense delivered by yours truly) and (guest "logic" from Bluestate Dave)
(News.Telegraph)

Saddam Hussein planned to use "camels of mass destruction" (Where the hell is PETA when you need them?!) as weapons to defend Iraq, loading them with bombs and directing them towards invading forces.

The animals were part of a plan to arm and equip foreign insurgents (who don't exist, because they're all "Freedom Fighters" down there) drawn up by the dictator peace loving nation-builder shortly before the American-led invasion three years ago, reveals a 37-page report, captured after the fall of Baghdad and just released by the Pentagon. It is part of a cache of thousands of documents that the United States Department of Defense says it does not have the resources to translate (thanks to Democrat-led slashing of the Military Intelligence Corps).

Earlier this month, the Pentagon released copies in the original Arabic onto the internet in the hope that others would interpret them into English. (No word yet on whether the "American" Civil indecent-Liberties Union will file invasion of privacy grievances on behalf of Iraqi Freedom Fighters Terrorists).

Handwritten on official paper, one of the reports appears to be a road map for the insurgency future of Iraq, with detailed instructions for training what it calls suicide bombers terrorists.

In the memo, they are described as "estishehadeyeen," Arabic for suicide martyrs, and would almost certainly have been foreign volunteers terrorists.

The memo details a training commission to be headed by senior officers, including a colonel from the "Directory of Political Orientation." Their job, says the report, was to "prepare a very intensive training course operate a terrorist camp," "to raise the physical fitness and train in the use of Kalashnikovs and hand grenades."

It continues: "The largest section of the course will be specialized to focus on using the explosive material in the body, in motorcycle, in cars, and in camels freedom of speech and the pursuit of happiness and all those neat things that just exist and have nothing to do with our Armed Services." Camels will be "provided by the Directory of General Military Intelligence."

The memo also reveals the incredible bureaucracy that underpinned Saddam's Iraq which was much safer back in the good-ol-Saddam-days. Rifles and hand grenades were to be provided by a Department of Armament and Equipping, explosives by the Directory of Military Engineering and "religious sermons that emphasise jihad'' by the Directory of Political Orientation and the Religious Scholars Terrorist Support Group.

The papers have been translated by Arabic-speaking members of Free Republic, a conservative internet discussion forum dirty rotten Rovian gang of thugs that believes the documents will justify British and American claims that Saddam had made Iraq a haven for terrorists nationalistic freedom fighters.

If the translation is correct, it suggests that many of the foreign fighters now attacking coalition forces and bombing Iraqi civilians were directly trained by the ever-peaceful Saddam regime, although there are no known reports of camels being used in suicide attacks.